Friday, May 25, 2012


I had a dream last night. Every time I woke up I was so confused as to where I was, and then every time I drifted back to sleep I was right back where I left off. It was one of those dreams that is so real feeling that your not sure where reality falls.

I was at home, our old house in Idaho, trying to get ready to move here. I was alone and every time I filled a box I would turn to find it empty. I would walk into rooms that I know I had emptied to see them filled with all our things again. I was really struggling with leaving, great sadness filled me.

One of the times I woke up and once I came to realize where I was I attempted to stay awake reading. It didn't work and I fell deep asleep. This time I was in the pasture, no one had wanted our horses I was leaving that day and they were all just standing there and I was leaving them there, all alone. I felt so terrible, like I had really failed them. I didn't want to leave but there was a strong weight pulling me away. I had my arms wrapped around a fuzzy buckskin neck tears streaming down my face and I was pulled away.

I awoke to Rozi crying, it was morning time to get up. I was here on an Island faraway.

This is a grand adventure, but I find myself missing all that I left behind very deeply today.

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